Saturday 23 November 2013
Tuesday 27 August 2013
To be killed or fattened?
Looks matter. I build my work around this fact. The way we look on the outside greatly impacts the way people see us, treat us, the way we behave, how we socialise, the groups we get into, etc. But how much is too much? At which point is it not just a matter of socialization, and becomes shallowness?
I have very recently been diagnosed with a condition that not only brings back the tortuous acne of my teenage years, but makes me put on weight too. Even better news is that the treatment for it also causes weight gain! Before asking about the dangers or consequences of this condition I am literally traumatised about gaining weight! I am researching more than I did on my thesis about how I can live through this without getting fat. Only meeting brick walls, I want to crumble into a ball and hide from the world.
A bit dramatic? I know. But I am not exaggerating. I don't want to eat. I don't even want to watch other people eat. I'm looking at recent pictures of myself in disgust. Helpless and hopeless. I have even considered not undergoing the treatment!
Am I crazy? You would think so, but, No. There are so many women who think just like this. There are people who never leave the house without makeup. There are girls who throw up after lunch to save themselves from imperfection.
I consider myself to be relatively intelligent. So for someone like me to be absolutely overwhelmed with anxiety over a matter of appearance, well, it scares me. I think about the more impressionable young women who cause themselves physical harm to protect from ugliness. You might be tempted to call these girls dumb, stupid or silly, but think about where it comes from. There must be some small actions you do that may be signs of your potential obsession with appearance. Think about it. When you wake up in the morning, do you first run to the mirror? Do you constantly suck in your stomach in public? What do you spend most of your time talking about?
Be aware of your level of shallowness. Don't let it overcome you.
I have very recently been diagnosed with a condition that not only brings back the tortuous acne of my teenage years, but makes me put on weight too. Even better news is that the treatment for it also causes weight gain! Before asking about the dangers or consequences of this condition I am literally traumatised about gaining weight! I am researching more than I did on my thesis about how I can live through this without getting fat. Only meeting brick walls, I want to crumble into a ball and hide from the world.
A bit dramatic? I know. But I am not exaggerating. I don't want to eat. I don't even want to watch other people eat. I'm looking at recent pictures of myself in disgust. Helpless and hopeless. I have even considered not undergoing the treatment!
Am I crazy? You would think so, but, No. There are so many women who think just like this. There are people who never leave the house without makeup. There are girls who throw up after lunch to save themselves from imperfection.
I consider myself to be relatively intelligent. So for someone like me to be absolutely overwhelmed with anxiety over a matter of appearance, well, it scares me. I think about the more impressionable young women who cause themselves physical harm to protect from ugliness. You might be tempted to call these girls dumb, stupid or silly, but think about where it comes from. There must be some small actions you do that may be signs of your potential obsession with appearance. Think about it. When you wake up in the morning, do you first run to the mirror? Do you constantly suck in your stomach in public? What do you spend most of your time talking about?
Be aware of your level of shallowness. Don't let it overcome you.
Wednesday 10 July 2013
The Courageous Cut
I have built my business around the fact that people are judged by what they look like. Even the way we see ourselves is affected by the way we look on the outside. I help women celebrate themselves- when they can love what they see in the mirror it's almost like they give themselves permission to love what's inside too! Recently I realised just how serious is the matter of appearance. There is a tangible fear attached to not being pretty! A FEAR.
I recently cut my hair. Short. I didn't do it because of any reason further than that I love short hair, and I wanted a change that would by more stylish and modern.The response to my new look was surprisingly overwhelming! People that I don't even know (but who recognise me from the blog) have stopped me to comment about it! Even more, have been opinions asserted about whether it was a good choice or not, and most importantly noted, is that I must be so brave to have done it! Interesting. Cutting my hair is an act of valour, because the potential negative consequence would be that it looks ugly? Think about the term "fashion risk". Risk? The same term that would be used to describe the actions of a tightrope walker, or a gambler or a deep sea diver-- cutting my hair short is a risk- a matter of life and death... no worse, a matter of like and hate.
While I know and appreciate that it is human nature to be concerned with appearances, am I still shocked and a bit disappointed by how strongly we hold on to our looks, because of the trepidation of what others may think about us. Someone forcibly asserted that I grow back my hair because my boyfriend will leave me. Their actual words? "May I strongly recommend that you grow your hair back? [Everybody] prefers long hair" Another response from a couple people has been that I have such nice hair and why would I cut it; a woman's beauty is her hair. My favourite might be that brides cannot have short hair so now I can't get engaged nor married until it grows back. Listen, true beauty starts from inside.You can be a nasty bitch with flowing locks of gold and look ugly as fuck to the people around you. I think of women who have lost their hair during Chemo therapy, and no woman is more beautiful to me than they are. I think about the girls who donate their ponytails to Locks of Love, and the mothers who cut their hair to show support to their daughters who are bald due to illness or surgery. And on a more shallow note, think about Halle Berry!
Some fab Shorties:
Do not be paralysed with anxiety over how others may judge you. And to the judges, unless you have something nice to say, don't say anything at all, especially if your opinion was not requested. I look forward to seeing more women be bold about their choices! Own who you are and reflect that fabulous biatch you are on the inside. The only person you need to please is yourself!
I recently cut my hair. Short. I didn't do it because of any reason further than that I love short hair, and I wanted a change that would by more stylish and modern.The response to my new look was surprisingly overwhelming! People that I don't even know (but who recognise me from the blog) have stopped me to comment about it! Even more, have been opinions asserted about whether it was a good choice or not, and most importantly noted, is that I must be so brave to have done it! Interesting. Cutting my hair is an act of valour, because the potential negative consequence would be that it looks ugly? Think about the term "fashion risk". Risk? The same term that would be used to describe the actions of a tightrope walker, or a gambler or a deep sea diver-- cutting my hair short is a risk- a matter of life and death... no worse, a matter of like and hate.
Some fab Shorties:
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| This is My Cousin, Marsha; the Fiercest of them all! |
Do not be paralysed with anxiety over how others may judge you. And to the judges, unless you have something nice to say, don't say anything at all, especially if your opinion was not requested. I look forward to seeing more women be bold about their choices! Own who you are and reflect that fabulous biatch you are on the inside. The only person you need to please is yourself!
 |
| My controversial new hair |
"In order to be irreplaceable, one must always be different" Coco Chanel
Tuesday 11 June 2013
The Ripple Effect: Candice's Story
So often we look at people's success and convince ourselves that it was handed to them. The truth is, good things do not just magically manifest themselves. Whether the journey is full of potholes, or smooth as freshly laid asphalt, it is still a journey. Every accomplishment whether big or small has come out of effort, time and most importantly; a thought.
The Ripple Effect is a concept that I have been looking at in the lives of many people whom I admire. Just like a single droplet can generate waves in an expansive pool, so too can a simple thought channel the unraveling of fruition. Everything we see, touch, feel, taste or experience, first started as an idea.
I sat down with Candice Baccus; Owner of Simply runway one afternoon, where she was telling me of all these big plans to involve more Trinidad Based Designers in her store. She kept throwing idea after idea to me, edifying even grander plans as I put in my two cents. Just over coffee, her amazing and inspiring vision was already beginning to actualise.
.
The story of Simply Runway wasn't so simple as I'm sure it appears sometimes. After investing all of their savings, and not being able to afford a space,Candice and her Husband, Issac almost had to turn away from their plans. ALMOST. Now after enjoying three years of serving an ever-growing and faithful clientele, they have recently opened a second branch, and have launched a huge initiative for local fashion, where they have gotten the support of FATT, CAFD, renowned designers and other important players in the industry. Life, and in this case, business, occur just as she says in the clip: through "Lucky breaks and perfect timing". There are amazing things waiting to happen to you, but you need to put in the ground work and be prepared not only to be able to deal with them, but to also see them.
If there is one thing I hope you take away from her story, is that whatever you are dreaming of doing or becoming, it is possible. Don't be paralysed by your fears. Stop telling yourself you are too young, too shy or aren't talented enough. Do your research and have the confidence to just go for it. What's the worst that could happen? What do you have to lose? Really , think about it. What will you lose? It just takes one droplet. Rides the waves and see where you end up.
The Ripple Effect is a concept that I have been looking at in the lives of many people whom I admire. Just like a single droplet can generate waves in an expansive pool, so too can a simple thought channel the unraveling of fruition. Everything we see, touch, feel, taste or experience, first started as an idea.
I sat down with Candice Baccus; Owner of Simply runway one afternoon, where she was telling me of all these big plans to involve more Trinidad Based Designers in her store. She kept throwing idea after idea to me, edifying even grander plans as I put in my two cents. Just over coffee, her amazing and inspiring vision was already beginning to actualise.
.
The story of Simply Runway wasn't so simple as I'm sure it appears sometimes. After investing all of their savings, and not being able to afford a space,Candice and her Husband, Issac almost had to turn away from their plans. ALMOST. Now after enjoying three years of serving an ever-growing and faithful clientele, they have recently opened a second branch, and have launched a huge initiative for local fashion, where they have gotten the support of FATT, CAFD, renowned designers and other important players in the industry. Life, and in this case, business, occur just as she says in the clip: through "Lucky breaks and perfect timing". There are amazing things waiting to happen to you, but you need to put in the ground work and be prepared not only to be able to deal with them, but to also see them.
.jpg) |
| At Simply Runway Accents |
If there is one thing I hope you take away from her story, is that whatever you are dreaming of doing or becoming, it is possible. Don't be paralysed by your fears. Stop telling yourself you are too young, too shy or aren't talented enough. Do your research and have the confidence to just go for it. What's the worst that could happen? What do you have to lose? Really , think about it. What will you lose? It just takes one droplet. Rides the waves and see where you end up.
 |
| Simply Runway Accents |
Video by Normal Normal Films
Photos of Simply Runway Accents Launch by Damian Luk Pat
Simply Runway and the new branch Simply Runway Accents are both located at Grand Bazaar
Tuesday 23 April 2013
Splurge vs steals: My picks for the best alternatives to pricey makeup
The first step to building great style is knowing and loving who you are; in whatever shape, size, colour or personality. It your blueprint for design, before any building can take place. You must first know who you are, in order to go about finding the right tools and equipment to build around your personal style.
3. We are all on the search for lipstick with staying power. No one likes to see their mouth left behind on a glass, or worse; running down their chin! While I was in UWI I discovered L'oreal Infallible Lipgloss, and over the years I experimented with all sorts of other stuff, but I would always go back to the Infallible! The first one I ever tried, has always been my favourite; Undeniable Mauve. Recently at a Bridal Shower, I won in a game, an Infallible Lipstick in a bright Coral Colour, which is now competing with my first love though! I just love how these lipsticks stay on through meals and constant chatting! Even better is the number of different colours to choose from! It seems endless.
4. I have tried a tonne of tinted moisurisers, but none took me through the day without looking like I rubbed my face on a bag of phoulorie. I had been on the look out for something easy as a rub-on cream, that provided some sort of coverage, but would keep me from being shiny. I experimented with the most celebrated tinted moisturiser; Laura Mercier, as well as Dior (which looks fab in the first hour, but doesn't go further than that) and some others. They weren't quite doing it for me. My cousin suggested I try Garnier's Skin Renew BB Cream, and upon taking that advice, I must say I've found it! I love that BB creams have added benefits for the skin, so I feel really good about putting it on. The coverage is pretty sheer, so I tend to add my concealer of choice under my eyes and on my pesky post-acne demons. Under some sheer mineral powder, this BB Cream is fantastic for day.
The foundation to be laid after this, is your body. Take care and nurture yourself with luxurious-feeling products. Take long baths. Exfoliate. Cleanse, tone, moisturise and photo-protect. Exercise. Eat well. You know what to do!
I definitely choose to invest in professional hair and makeup products. No matter how fab the outfit is- the power of a Bad Hair Day cannot be overcome. However, these things can get pretty pricey, and I'm always on the look out for less expensive alternatives. I have already found some makeup and hair products and tools that I would even choose instead of the bank-breakers. Here's what I love so far!
1. While running to the Guardian building for our CNC3 interview on a hot Monday morning, my Co-host for "Own you Beauty, Power and Magic", Sacha, was stunned that my face remained matte and fresh. She on the other hand likened herself to a Saheena! (I didn't say it eh- she did. I didn't think she was quite at Saheena-status yet.) I whipped out my secret for staying dry! I know what you're thinking- it has to be the MAC Oil Control Lotion, right? While I think that MAC has an amazing product, L'oreal's Translucide Powder over my liquid foundation, seems to seal in all moisture, leaving me fresh-faced all day! Best part is, I got it at a nearby SuperPharm for under TT$100!
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| Came home after a loooong day, and my skin still looked as fresh as when I left the house hours before! |
2. I firmly believe in having great makeup-applying tools! I searched long and hard for affordable yet quality brushes, and often found myself spending hundreds on each brush since the cheaper ones basically SUCKED. The bristles were either too loosely packed and would fall out on my face, or they simply didn't feel good on my skin. I had decided that brushes would be one of those things that I had no choice but to splurge on, and then Eco Tools came into my life! Not only are these brushes (case and all) made from natural (bamboo) or recycled materials, but they feel amazingly soft, and apply makeup just as well as any professional brush would! I got all mine at SuperPharm, but I see that you can order from their website too! I see a whole bunch of brushes that I will soon be adding to my list at www.ecotools.com Here are some of the ones I use:
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| My First EcoTools Purchase- No turning back now! |
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| My Latest EcoTools Purchase |
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| Most Convenient: Retractable Kabuki Brush |
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| First Love: Undeniable Mauve |
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| Charismatic Coral |
4. I have tried a tonne of tinted moisurisers, but none took me through the day without looking like I rubbed my face on a bag of phoulorie. I had been on the look out for something easy as a rub-on cream, that provided some sort of coverage, but would keep me from being shiny. I experimented with the most celebrated tinted moisturiser; Laura Mercier, as well as Dior (which looks fab in the first hour, but doesn't go further than that) and some others. They weren't quite doing it for me. My cousin suggested I try Garnier's Skin Renew BB Cream, and upon taking that advice, I must say I've found it! I love that BB creams have added benefits for the skin, so I feel really good about putting it on. The coverage is pretty sheer, so I tend to add my concealer of choice under my eyes and on my pesky post-acne demons. Under some sheer mineral powder, this BB Cream is fantastic for day.
Wednesday 3 April 2013
Making Love
It has been labelled as a cultural flaw, that Trinidadians are not the most supportive bunch. We are excited about bacchanal and corruption. Our newspapers are slathered with sensationalist pictures and headlines about the demise of the nation and its leaders.We cheer at others' failure. We are hesitant to trust- In fact we think something is wrong with anyone who trusts at all. We mock anyone who attempts to do anything out-of-the-box,
...or so I thought.
I have been pleasantly surprised by a level of love and kindness by my fellow Trinidadian women.
I have always felt somewhat out of place. I never really jumped on any bandwagon growing up. As a matter of fact, I think I rebelled at the norm intentionally, because I never wanted to conform to anything. In a High School where the Science classes were so full that they had to be divided into two, and every child dreamed of the title "Dr", I was sketching gowns, and looking to follow in Diane Hunt's footsteps. My passion for fashion and the longing to create beauty, led me to the heart of it all- women.
It is because of women and their desire to be forever changing and evolving, that the fashion industry has thrived. I have been surrounded by a plethora of amazing and influential women throughout my life, and today I am proud to be a part of a sisterhood that works to fire up a revolution with new ideas and positive resonance. When I made fashion fashion my full-time career, I was met with unexpected love and support. I was so used to people questioning me about the frivolity of it all, and wondering how I could possibly disregard all my years of formal education to do something so unheard of in this culture! Now to have people in my corner, congratulating me for taking these risks and offering kudos-- well I didn't see that one coming.
Do you believe in "The Secret"? That what we put into the Universe would return to us? Well my genuine cheer-leading for the women around me has come back. I have met some amazing people in the past few years. I feel like I have known them my whole life, and that I love them like they are my own real sisters. In a society where courtesy and patience aren't common, gestures of generosity are a big deal. These women have far surpassed any expectation I have had for our relationships, and I cannot truly express how blessed I feel to have them in my life.
Very recently I discovered that a group of young women (that I have seen grow up before my eyes) has gotten together to start a non-profit campaign, "The Fairy Godmother Project", to donate graduation dresses to high school girls! Only the other day did I realise that my friend's sister is the founder Studio W; a place where women can go to strengthen their minds and bodies. Without having to ask twice, amazingly selfless ladies have been using their own time and resources to help me have a truly special event on April 13. So if you are a little bit cynical (like me) stop and look around at the magically giving people that surround you. There are people who will root for you like their life depended on it. There are people who genuinely believe in you and want to see you take on the world with success. There are people who emanate real love, even for a stranger.
So to these special ladies, I just felt to write tonight, "to put down in words, how wonderful life is, now you're in the world"
...or so I thought.
I have been pleasantly surprised by a level of love and kindness by my fellow Trinidadian women.
I have always felt somewhat out of place. I never really jumped on any bandwagon growing up. As a matter of fact, I think I rebelled at the norm intentionally, because I never wanted to conform to anything. In a High School where the Science classes were so full that they had to be divided into two, and every child dreamed of the title "Dr", I was sketching gowns, and looking to follow in Diane Hunt's footsteps. My passion for fashion and the longing to create beauty, led me to the heart of it all- women.
It is because of women and their desire to be forever changing and evolving, that the fashion industry has thrived. I have been surrounded by a plethora of amazing and influential women throughout my life, and today I am proud to be a part of a sisterhood that works to fire up a revolution with new ideas and positive resonance. When I made fashion fashion my full-time career, I was met with unexpected love and support. I was so used to people questioning me about the frivolity of it all, and wondering how I could possibly disregard all my years of formal education to do something so unheard of in this culture! Now to have people in my corner, congratulating me for taking these risks and offering kudos-- well I didn't see that one coming.
Do you believe in "The Secret"? That what we put into the Universe would return to us? Well my genuine cheer-leading for the women around me has come back. I have met some amazing people in the past few years. I feel like I have known them my whole life, and that I love them like they are my own real sisters. In a society where courtesy and patience aren't common, gestures of generosity are a big deal. These women have far surpassed any expectation I have had for our relationships, and I cannot truly express how blessed I feel to have them in my life.
Very recently I discovered that a group of young women (that I have seen grow up before my eyes) has gotten together to start a non-profit campaign, "The Fairy Godmother Project", to donate graduation dresses to high school girls! Only the other day did I realise that my friend's sister is the founder Studio W; a place where women can go to strengthen their minds and bodies. Without having to ask twice, amazingly selfless ladies have been using their own time and resources to help me have a truly special event on April 13. So if you are a little bit cynical (like me) stop and look around at the magically giving people that surround you. There are people who will root for you like their life depended on it. There are people who genuinely believe in you and want to see you take on the world with success. There are people who emanate real love, even for a stranger.
So to these special ladies, I just felt to write tonight, "to put down in words, how wonderful life is, now you're in the world"
Friday 22 March 2013
Thank you disillusionment
All those motivational quotes we pin, and songs we echo in our cars, the adages of generations past, the lingering words of your mother - They all arrive at one central idea- that giving gratitude for daily mercies and lifelong blessings is the root to all beauty and happiness.
I am quick to complain about so much. I worry about my dreams not being met. I constantly calculate my income to bills ratio with anxiety and frustration. Sometimes it takes another's humble surroundings to really give you that slap of reality. I have a home to go to; one that I own. I have a toilet and running water so that I need not relieve myself in the mud. I am able to purchase food when there isn't a home cooked meal on my stove. I had the opportunity to receive a high-class education. I was able to quit my job and pursue my dream career. I have parents who have given me everything without the expectation of anything being returned. It does not always click to me that there are thousands of people living right next to me who look to these basic abilities as though they are unreachable.
There is a very special woman who is currently going through a seriously trying time in her life. I have never met someone so loving and kind and thoughtful and bright and honest and gentle-- and today I went to her home. If such a grateful and beautiful soul could survive in such surroundings, then I have no excuses. Our hardships make us stronger and better people. Instead of complaining about them we should be grateful to have overcome them and look back with appreciation.
Alanis was on to something- One of the most beautifully written songs.
"How bout getting off these antibiotics?
How bout stopping eating when I’m full up?
How bout them transparent dangling carrots?
How bout that ever elusive "Could have"?
Thank you India.
Thank you terror.
Thank you disillusionment.
Thank you frailty.
Thank you consequence.
Thank you, thank you silence.
How bout me not blaming you for everything?
How bout me enjoying the moment for once?
How bout how good it feels to finally forgive you?
How bout grieving it all one at a time ?
The moment I let go of it was the moment
I got more than I could handle.
The moment I jumped off of it
was the moment I touched down.
How bout no longer being masochistic?
How bout remembering your divinity?
How bout unabashedly bawling your eyes out?
How bout not equating death with stopping?
Thank you India.
Thank you providence.
Thank you disillusionment.
Thank you nothingness.
Thank you clarity.
Thank you thank you silence."
I am quick to complain about so much. I worry about my dreams not being met. I constantly calculate my income to bills ratio with anxiety and frustration. Sometimes it takes another's humble surroundings to really give you that slap of reality. I have a home to go to; one that I own. I have a toilet and running water so that I need not relieve myself in the mud. I am able to purchase food when there isn't a home cooked meal on my stove. I had the opportunity to receive a high-class education. I was able to quit my job and pursue my dream career. I have parents who have given me everything without the expectation of anything being returned. It does not always click to me that there are thousands of people living right next to me who look to these basic abilities as though they are unreachable.
There is a very special woman who is currently going through a seriously trying time in her life. I have never met someone so loving and kind and thoughtful and bright and honest and gentle-- and today I went to her home. If such a grateful and beautiful soul could survive in such surroundings, then I have no excuses. Our hardships make us stronger and better people. Instead of complaining about them we should be grateful to have overcome them and look back with appreciation.
Alanis was on to something- One of the most beautifully written songs.
"How bout getting off these antibiotics?
How bout stopping eating when I’m full up?
How bout them transparent dangling carrots?
How bout that ever elusive "Could have"?
Thank you India.
Thank you terror.
Thank you disillusionment.
Thank you frailty.
Thank you consequence.
Thank you, thank you silence.
How bout me not blaming you for everything?
How bout me enjoying the moment for once?
How bout how good it feels to finally forgive you?
How bout grieving it all one at a time ?
The moment I let go of it was the moment
I got more than I could handle.
The moment I jumped off of it
was the moment I touched down.
How bout no longer being masochistic?
How bout remembering your divinity?
How bout unabashedly bawling your eyes out?
How bout not equating death with stopping?
Thank you India.
Thank you providence.
Thank you disillusionment.
Thank you nothingness.
Thank you clarity.
Thank you thank you silence."
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