Swinging Out

Sometimes life just sucks.
We post all these humorous quotes about people feeling beat up or let down, and we laugh, because we relate and the irony is just plain funny. My Facebook NewsFeed is ALWAYS riddled with "I hate Monday" jokes or "People are annoying" satire. And.. most of the time I tend to agree with the cynicism. And I click the "Share" button. I literally share my bitterness. Misery does love its company.

Recently I have been caught in one hell of a rut. I've been a banshee to my boyfriend, and been unavailable to my family, because I felt sad. I am a people-pleaser. I need to do everything right, and for everyone to like it. Too bad for me, I was challenged. I was working for someone who I could not make happy. I was beyond frustrated. I would grit my teeth and smile despite the many shut-downs and disrespectful dismissals.  Even though I feel like I bent over and compromised my own creativity and who I am just to suit her requests, she could not be satisfied. When I decided to resign, she called me a failure.

Now, I don't think I'm a failure, but I let her get to me.. for a minute.

Now this is magic: Sacha Lalla, (my dear friend and personal coach) began her 7 week TeleSeminar a couple days ago- smack dab in the middle of my despair. I happened to be online when I got the email alert that the session was about to begin and thought "Oh hey! She's on. Lemme listen in for a bit" The topic was on "Ultimate Self Expression", and I got all the answers to the questions that were burning me in my desolate state.

The more authentic you are to yourself, the more grounded you become. I was feeling like shit basically because I was feeding that monster inside of me that does actually doubt that I am good at what I do. I was neglecting to properly nourish myself with the assurances of my reputation. I want to be like those amazing, magnetic women that enter a room and everyone takes notice. What makes them stand out? While most of us look to others or other places for inspiration and ideas, these women look to themselves! They are their own source of Beauty, Power and Magic. They don't look to others for permission or acceptance. They know who they are and what they want out of life. "They are madly in love with themselves" as Sacha puts it. I wasn't really giving myself that sort of attention. I was basing my self worth on what this woman thought of me. She and I don't even share the same taste, so why was I letting her opinion of me impact me so much? Ah. We all have our silly moments.

Sometimes we do things just for acceptance, but unless we give out of desire, we will never be giving enough. We can only share of ourselves from a place of abundance. Sacha says that "Self expression and aliveness are infectious". When we have the audacity to "Swing out" and act against our fears and what people might think, we actually inspire others to feel more comfortable to do the same. So I'm swinging out. I'm doing me. We're often shy to admit it, but there is nothing wrong with professing that we love who we are! I'm great. I'm talented, hard-working, outspoken, friendly and fun- And more so than the "I hate Monday" memes, THAT is something worth sharing.

If you would like to meet Sacha in person, she will actually be in Trinidad to lead the "Beauty, Power and Magic" workshop in April.

 Click Here for details! http://www.facebook.com/BeautyPowerMagic?ref=hl

Staycation

I have been working overtime! For over 3 years now, I have been constantly dedicated to making a name for myself in Trinidad's fashion industry. Coming from a place where it's all about who you know, and not what you know, provides a special challenge, especially when you don't know anyone, and no one knows you!

 I'll say that I have been doing pretty well for myself. In these three short years I have accomplished quite a bit of formal fashion knowledge from 2 different schools, I interned for an amazing Stylist and mentor, I got the chance to meet and work with some of the most influential names in the industry, started my blogs and led them to a sizable group of followers, I'm organizing my second Women's beauty and Empowerment event, I'm fashion editor for an upcoming magazine, recently built www.nomorefashionvictims.com.... I really have been going at it strongly for a while. I forget to acknowledge the tremendous efforts and achievements, and like a true catastrophizer (thank you Sacha Lalla for my new favourite word) all I could think about is how much more I need to do and how little I'm being recognized.

 If this is you- a person who is never satisfied - perhaps you are like me, and need a change in perspective. I never let anything rest. I lose sleep over every task, I only have the finish line in my mind, and I never stop to just breathe and give myself a pat on the back. So I'm going to take some valued advice from a friend, and take a few days off, to pamper and reward myself for a job well done. It need not be a job completed to deserve applause. The road is long, and one should take a pit stop every now and again to switch off and re-fuel.

Here are some ideas for a little time alone:

1. Spa Day! My favourite spa in Trinidad is the La Vita Day spa, (shown in the picture to the left) which is located at the ground floor of the Bhp Billiton building next to Movietowne. After a massage they give you 15 mins in an amazing steam shower. I think I prefer the steam shower more than the massage. Super relaxing.
If I do decide on a Spa day, I think I might give the Hyatt a try this time though. Even though the price is exorbitant, a spa visit gives you access to the pool. Now that is a nice way to finish off a day of pampering! A little dip and a cocktail.... mmmhmmm

2. Hotel Sleepover I expect that after Carnival and into Spring, hotels in the Caribbean should be begging for visitors. I have membership to Hilton's Premium Club which gives me specials on rooms, restaurant, etc. I  have had a couple negative experiences with Hilton for customer service in the past, so I won't risk going there to upset myself on my stress-free escapade. However, staying overnight, getting some room-service and taking in a view are all nice options for a staycation.

The pool at the Hyatt Regency, Trinidad

3. Beach Not only is being at the beach the most relaxing thing you can do, but living on an island gives so many opportunities for an exotic experience without having to jump on a plane! There are several beach side properties you can rent- I've been to Mt. Plaisir at Grande Riviere, and woke up to turtles hatching and making their way to the water! Even without over nighting, it's fun to drive around and find unpopular bays that are untouched by commercialisation.

4. Picnic In highschool, a bunch of  my girlfriends and I got together for a great picnic at the Botanical Gardens, after a day at the zoo. Neither the gardens nor the zoo is too tempting these days because of crime and lack of maintenance, but I'm sure there are other places that would be beautiful.

If you have any suggestions do send them my way! I plan to take my days off next week!